The Delicious Dram

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When it comes to whisky-making, the copper stills used to distill the spirit are often very very old, sometimes hundreds of years old.

Over time the stills get a bit bashed and each develops its unique pattern of bumps and dents. The wild thing is, this affects the taste of the whisky that particular still produces. Some whisky makers now depend on that unique taste as a mark of their brand and would never change the still, no matter how old or battered, as that would alter the taste.

Similarly, as human beings, if our efforts out in the world aren’t bringing the results we’re seeking, then it might be a useful time to regard our own ‘bumps and dents’.

Whatever is happening in our world is often a reflection of what’s going on inside us. The natural human reaction when the desired results aren’t happening is to push through, keep going. We believe more and more action needs to be taken.

This belief is a fallacy.

Action is actually the end point in the sequence, not the start point, not the catalyst.  A much more  useful strategy when, despite all good plans and action, progress is still not being made, is to delve inside and find out what’s going on in relation to that particular circumstance.

Our actions come from our thoughts; our thoughts come from our beliefs, and our beliefs come from the myriad experiences and teachings we’ve received throughout our lives – especially in childhood – that have combined to form our particular ‘map’ of the world. Tweak one thing and the belief changes, change the belief it changes the thoughts, change the thoughts it changes the action and change the action you change the results.

That tweak changes the taste of our particular whisky, and the more we work in a positive fashion on whom and what we want to become, the sweeter, more pungent and delicious the dram we produce.

Slainte!

Fold, Scrunch or…

 

My life turned into a joke at the weekend – literally!

We’ve all heard that old gag about the person being in a public toilet cubicle and the person in the next cubicle says “Hello?”

And the gag teller replies with ‘Hello’ and starts conversing with the other cubicle dweller only to be talked over, as it turns out other cubicle dweller is on the phone.

Well there was me at the weekend having to quickly and unexpectedly use a public convenience.

There was I, sitting, all systems operating, so to speak, when I discovered there was no toilet paper in the holder!

EEEEK! I was definitely in a bit of a pickle.

Then I heard someone take up residence in the next cubicle!  Brilliant! Saved!

I enquired with a hesitant but loud enough “Hello?”

My voice echoed off the 1970s tiling.

No response.

I repeated “Hello?” this time a bit louder.

Silence.

I thought “Bitch is ignoring me”.

And then a few seconds later came the sound I longed to hear as she said “Hello?”

Relief flooded over me and with thankfulness I said “Oh hi, do you have any toilet paper in that cubicle you can spare?”

But the end of my sentence was cut off as she said “Hi, yeh, I’m here, I’m just in the toilet, I’ll meet you at Coles in a minute.” into her phone, and continued to have a full blown conversation while sitting on the potty!

Bitch.

There I was, totally alone, no handbag (and resultant residue of tissues and receipts that may have come in handy) and no idea of how to get out of the situation.

Let’s just say that I’m now intimate with the number and quality of layers of paper it takes to make up a loo roll tube.

The difference between this event being a disaster and an amusing anecdote is mindset. Over the years I’ve trained my mind to look for the humour in everything as I scan life for material in writing and performing stand-up comedy, but the by-product is the discovery of how wonderful a humorous re-frame of life can be in coping with life’s lumps and bumps.

Both laughter and tears are responses to stressful situations – they each release tension in either one way or another. If we choose to respond in tears and sadness it closes down our options and leaves us without choice, a victim of circumstance.

If we choose laughter (which can also involve tears, but of a different kind) it takes away the power the situation may have had over us, we keep our sovereignty of life and we retain the ability to make positive choices in how to get under, over, past or through the situation with significantly less stress and sadness.

And that includes being stuck in a ‘situation’ in a toilet cubicle with no toilet paper. I felt a bit like Indiana Jones in that cubicle. I thought, ‘what would Indy do?’ And you can bet I was also thinking “Possible comedy material!” – after all, most comedy is born out of someone else’s pain!

So, after all that, I have one question for you;

Do you fold, scrunch… or scrape?

I conduct courses and workshops teaching how to speak with  influence and authority, and to develop your powers of humour and comedy for pleasure, public speaking and life coping skills.

The next Comedy Course for Beginners starts in Adelaide on 15 October – email me on maggie@funnyfarm.net.au for details

The next workshop The Power of Comedy in Business will take place in Melbourne on 25 October – for details click this link  

What a Ride!

 

FF with FBOne of the things that you don’t expect when you give up the day job is the massive internal, personal changes that start to happen as you start out on your journey working full time in your own business.

First there is the good stuff – the massive increase in passion and purpose. It’s perfectly normal to start working at 6am in your nightie in front of the computer because your brain is racing and you need to get it all downloaded and in print on the screen before it melts like the springtime snow.

As you ease out of your employee mindset (not easy when you’ve been one for thirty-something years) you gain a new sense of yourself, of the things you achieve, the things you create and the changes you make in peoples lives with the stuff you have to offer.

Then there’s the darker side; the self doubt, the financial insecurity, the worry of not knowing how this story ends. These thoughts are hard taskmasters but they are also a gift. They force you to develop resilience, to dig deep and really earn your stripes as someone who is bringing something new to the world that will benefit the world. This life game is not for wimps!

One of the mental tussles I’ve been going through is how to actually bring that stuff to the world in a way that makes sense for me and my clients. In other words – what’s my niche? I’ve been doing ok as a generalist coach and trainer but I knew my message and my vehicle for delivering all these goodies needed honing. My lovely coach Leonie explained that it was like giving birth and ideas, like babies, need an incubation period.

Well, just like an expectant mother – and just as wise Leonie had said – it has taken almost nine months before I got well and truly whacked on the head with the ‘obvious stick’! Let me explain; all my life I’ve been a Communication junkie. I worked in Corporate Communications for 25 years and carried on parallel careers in theatre and comedy as well as becoming a coach and an accredited NLP practitioner. After much reflection I realised that it was no different now, and my passion continues to be how we speak to ourselves, how we speak to the world and how we speak to each other.

So the upshot of it all is I’ll be channeling my coaching and training through the mediums (media!) that I know and love best:

  • More Than Words – Powerful presentation coaching.
  • The Funny Farm – Stand up Comedy for Beginners
  • The Joy Protocol – comedy shows
  • Personal and Business Coaching

It’s very exciting because as soon as I knew exactly how I wanted to do all these things, exactly the right people showed up in my life to make it all happen and it’s happening soon!

As Bill Hicks said, this life is just a ride, and what a crazy wonderful ride it is!

Stuuuuuck!

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I’m in that space right now where I can’t do anything!

I’m about to launch two events in the coming week and pilot an awesome program the following week and I’m stuck because I need to confirm dates and venues and make sure that they fit in with other dates for other projects that are, as yet, unconfirmed. And it’s the weekend, and no one confirms anything on the weekend (which is as it should be).

As an action oriented person, this stuckness is not conducive to my well- being. I’d rather be like the mama duck who moves to get her ducks in a row rather than waiting for them to assemble and pronounce themselves ready.

However I need to learn the lesson –I need to learn to relax when there is no other option but to do so and that the things that need to unfold will do so in their own time (with a bit of a push from me smiley). And I suspect that its not just me who needs to take a breath and a step back. We put so much cache on ‘making things happen’ that we often forget to read the energies around us and maximise their usefulness – the energies of society, our culture, the times, of the people who surround us and of the ether where a trained instinct can overcome the mental flurry to really read what’s going on.

So, that’s a long-winded way of saying have a great Sunday, and have a great following week where the wind will be at your back and you’ll be astounded at the all-encompassing un-stuck-ness of everything.

Enjoy!

The Highs and Lows of Comedy Festival Life

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I’ve been in Melbourne for the last week, away from my  home city of Adelaide, with friends and colleagues Kate and Kehau performing our show Three Stuffed Mums. 

It has been an interesting, enlightening, heartwarming time in many ways – and we still have one week to go. In other ways it has really brought  home for me the absolute value of having capabilities in resilience, in self-knowledge, positive mindset and so many other things I teach people about in their day to day lives.

If you thought the life of a stand up comedian is all laughs, then think again. It probably is for that top two or three per cent in the industry who have agents and managers and publicists etc to do all that other production work for them, but for most comics at the festival we have to do all that plus perform the show itself.

A typical example is the activity of flyering. That’s where you go to hand out flyers in the street to passers by in the hope they will come to the show either that night or some other night. If you were thin-skinned then the amount of people who reject the offer of a flyer, who often won’t even meet your gaze, might cause you to crumble as it could be very disheartening. On the other hand when you realise that how people respond to you is actually mostly about them and not so much about you (unless you’re punching them – then it’s about you!)  it takes the heat off. Ah well, some people just have bad days, and some people aren’t as nice as we would like. On the other hand when you do manage to engage someone in genuine conversation it’s a real joy and lifts the spirits so much.

It’s not uncommon at large comedy or Fringe festivals to have a fairly small audience for performances. They are really not money-making exercises – more a ‘trade show’ kind of thing. A small audience for a theatre production would not have quite as much impact as it would on a comedy performance where the energy and interaction between the performer and the audience actually feeds and fuels the performance to a much greater extent. At times like those with a small group you not only have to lead in as far as it’s you doing the performance regardless of the energy offered by the audience (smaller groups can feel inhibited about being overtly demonstrative with clapping, cheering and laughing), but you also have to lead yourself with a positive and determined mindset while building the rapport with the audience. If you can inject energy, build rapport and make it ok for them to be loud then the energy tends to rise throughout your spot and the audience gets the laughs they came for. It’s like they need that permission from the person on the stage and the rest of the group to laugh out loud.

The third challenge is being away from home. I’m finding that the older I get the more of a  homebody I’m becoming. Two weeks away can seem like a huge chunk of time, but the ability to prioritise, concentrate energy on the task at hand and do the job that I’m here for actually helps to not only make the time pass quickly but also makes it more enjoyable. There’s a certainty in routine that’s satisfying and assists in self-sufficiency – and we all know that the more we get what we need from internal sources rather than external sources then the more resilient, happy and healthy we are – big bonus all round!

We’re enjoying this marvellous opportunity to play at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. We’re getting good audience numbers compared to other first time shows and we’re having a ball not only performing but connecting with our audiences and having the opportunity to connect with other comedians. The bottom line – making people laugh is a lot of fun!

Happy Australia Day!

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Happy Australia Day! It’s a day that gives pause for thought both for those people who are Australian by birth and those who are Australian by choice.

Coming from Scotland I’ve often been asked whether I was torn between the country of my birth and the country I choose to live in, but I don’t actually see a dilemma. Just as a person grows up and gets married and goes to live with their new partner and subsequent family I see Scotland as the place where I grew and formed and Australia as the opportunity for my next adventures in life. No place can take the place in my history or my heart of Scotland, and it may even have a place in my future. In the meantime I live in a country I love so much that I chose to become a citizen on the very day I became eligible to do so.

There is a lot of talk about the political and social issues du jour here in Australia, but for a moment I’ll give you a snapshot of my little corner; I live in a nice suburb in a slightly daggy but loveable house that contains a happy family and three dogs. In our corner of the street our newest neighbour moved in ten years ago, so we’ve seen each other’s families grow up and we all know each other and know we can chap on anyone’s door for help or coffee (though we rarely do – should do the coffee more). We can chat over the back fence – when we got  new fencing done I had to put an old upturned plant tub to be able to see over for the chats. And in a rare event a house around the corner was up for sale just before Christmas and was bought by our neighbour’s daughter and her family, so the suburban idyll continues.

The neighbours are mostly Italian migrants or the sons and daughters of Italian migrants. Exceptions are us and Tony and Robyn across the back who are of UK extraction. The commonality is that no matter whether our accents hail from Piedmont to Sicily, from Glasgow to London, or from Port Hedland to Geelong and anywhere in between, we are all Australian – and that’s the key – the diversity.

This song says it all: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjkrjYitgeA

Happy Australia Day!